Playing our roles

28 November 2021

Each one of us was ‘thrown into this world’. 

No one has had a say in the location and time of their birth, nor their parents’ ethnic and socio-cultural backgrounds. We have to live with it and make the best of it…

Nevertheless, we all can distance ourselves from ourselves to develop an awareness of our identities and the roles and (im)possibilities that go with them.

However, self-distancing is undoubtedly more difficult for some than others because of our individual starting points.

Kierkegaard says life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.

That is true, of course, but it does not mean that life is pure improvisation.

Setting goals is a well-known way of giving direction to life and the various roles we (want to) play in it. However, life experience teaches us that there comes a time when we have to take account of our role fulfilment, evaluate it and ask ourselves whether the sum of our goals has led to the role we wanted to play in life.

As parents, we ultimately see what has become of our children and what bonds they have with each other; as an immigrant, one considers his integration process; as adults, you look at what kind of student you have been; as retirees, we evaluate our role as a colleague or leader.

Based on the above, in Logotherapy & Existential Analysis by Viktor Frankl we focus on values rather than goals. This is based on the premise that essential goals find their origin in our (often unconscious) values.

The more we are aware of what is essential to us, our values, the better we can shape our life (forwards) and the roles we want to play in it to conclude (backwards) that we have at least played them consciously. 

In this way, as a Logotherapist, I hope to support a conscious and responsible way of life.Don’t hesitate to get in touch with me if you would like to discuss your way of fulfilling your roles.

A new Porsche (…) has never contributed to a meaningful life

4 November 2021

The desire for a happy and meaningful life implies the danger that we seek meaning in being happy.


So, what is the difference between happiness and meaning?

That happiness cannot be bought may be an open door. Many purchases, however, are inspired by the desire to experience a moment of happiness. The lovely dress, the cool watch, the ice cream …. fill in the blank.

In a time when everyone is their own happiness’s blacksmith, and we are constantly showcasing our euphoria, we soon find ourselves caught up in the rat race of “who’s happiest here? 

No matter how much we want it, happiness doesn’t get planned. Instead, it is a byproduct of the moments we are truly absorbed in something.

Too much wishing hinders us from finding what we really need.

Whereas happiness is more focused on the self, on receiving and having, meaning is focused on giving, on the relationship with something, with others and the other. 

Meaning thus arises not when we get what we want but when we live our values and realize relevant goals based on them. Meaning does not arise within us but between us and something or someone else.

Victor Frankl sees meaning as something objective. Meaning arises when we make a change in the world based on our values. No matter how small or large it may be.

From Logotherapy & Existential Analysis, we work with your values to function from your actual being and be able to do that which ultimately makes you happy.